Outdoor Truths

I rose early that morning, slightly before the alarm went off on my iPhone 16. I slipped quietly into my Eddie Bauer flip flops and headed to my Kohler commode. The Phillips 60-watt, 130-volt light bulb worked perfectly. After fixing my Martha White, self- rising, blueberry muffins, I headed downstairs. There in my Rubbermaid container were the clothes I would choose for my morning hunt. First, my Life is Good "essentials" and then a base layer of wicking garments overlayed by my Kryptek Camo, I shed my Eddie Bauers and donned my Lacrosse, 500-gram Burley boots. I grabbed a snack and a drink and stuffed them into my Cabela's backpack. I drove frantically in my Toyota Tundra, but I knew I was safe thanks to my 20-inch Nitto Grappler tires. After stopping at Hardees for my cup of coffee, I finally arrived at the farm I would hunt that morning. After listening to the weather report on the Weather Channel App, I knew it would be a great day. It didn't take long to find the tree I would climb. I wrapped my API Grand Slam Magnum tree-stand around its base and slowly ascended while moving my Hunter Specialty safety harness up as I went.

Once there, I checked my PSE bow, careful to give extra attention to my Trophy Taker drop away rest and fiber optics sight. It wasn't long before I heard the rustle of leaves. I raised my Vortex 8 x 42 binoculars and, sure enough, a deer was approaching. I aimed my Bushnell 500 Range Finder and marked a 25-yard shot. When the deer passed by, I launched my 400-gram Easton Carbon arrow. The deer fell. I spent the next 30 minutes in that tree stand eating my Little Debbie cake and drinking my Cumberland Gap water thinking how wonderful it is to have the opportunity to be able to enjoy hunting just as my forefathers did.

I would like to thank all of my sponsors who gladly sell their stuff to Wal-Mart and other fine department stores, so I can buy them there. I would also like to say hi to all the people who have made me the hunter I am. And of course, I want to give thanks to God for giving me the ability to do what I do - along with my pit-crew.